There's this thing and it's called TV and I watch it.
TV is the single most destructive force to a psyche. It's all about everything you are not. It makes you feel bad that you are not that. Everyone aspires to be all that is on TV and the lowest common denominator is the holy grail, damned be those who opt to pass.
Because I don't have cable, I am spared knowing just how loser I am, the breadth and depth of my failure. But I know enough to know that TV has educated many, many people who covet their chance of being on TV, an actual possibility with so many channels to schedule.
Many years ago I predicted we would all one day have our own TV station. Wait for it.
I've never seen an episode of Jersey Shore and doing so might change this statement: I like Snookie. I've only ever seen her on Letterman and she's funny and isn't thinking she's anything other than what she is and has no apologies for it.
This is to say, I'm not an old person thinking all those youngster TV shows are an abomination. Had cable once, loved South Park, loved Jackass.
That Housewives thing, that ilk, not so much.
That ILK. There is an ilk of superiority and petty catiness that wasn't once so prevalent, superiority for reasons that don't actually exist. I apologize for my archaic reference, lacking cable I don't have the current names, but it started with Paris Hilton-et-al. Good looking to themselves, too much money not earned, too much idle time, not very bright, nothing really of substance. With this your resume, many, many people are qualified for the job, and many are getting it, the Kardashians notwithstanding. Famous Hollowness. Emptiness. Shallowness. Etc. The Ilk of the Vacant Superior.
They have defined what is pretty and what is ugly and if you want your own show you need to take it to the next level, and then the next level, and so on, as many have. You need to be even more shallow, even more stupid, and even more vapid, but it doesn't matter because you're on TV now, and you get to decide who matters.
Once there was religion and that taught us how to live and then there were movies and they taught us how to live. This was good when the movies were good.
(I don't believe in god, I'm just saying.)
Not only do I not own the right car, I don't own a car. I don't have the right job, the right clothes, the right hair, shoes, money, gadgets, residence, priorities, and I don't have cable, for chrissake!
Which makes me very, very ugly. I know this because when I go out onto the world, the world treats me poorly, and I've spent good chunks of time trying to figure this out. I'm pretending to be nice, I make eye contact, I endeavor reasonable conversation to no avail. It's because there are so many people now walking around in their own reality TV Show deciding the rest of us. Decidedly superior for many vacant and material reasons, it is for art that they talk to me and treat me like shit. So one day I stepped into my failure of a life, closed the door and turned the latch, finally.
chapter 3.